The image in my mind | Day 11 of Optislim

I have a particular image in my head I’d like to revisit. The emotions, the sensations, the vibrancy.

off for a run around Jells

It’s the day I was admitted into hospital for my gallstones. No, I don’t want to revisit that! Prior to being driven to the Emergency Room at Monash Mike and I went out to Jells Park here in Melbourne. It was an absolutely glorious day and after we both went for a 2.5km run around the lake we sat down on a blanket and ate some fruit and I listened to some music and chilled out while Mike went and took photos.

It’s – until the gall stone attack- one of my favorite moments. It’s a combination of… pride- for running around the track and feeling great about it, positive self esteem- because I was coming up to the 30kgs lost mark, joy- for the fruit I was eating I just…

at Jells Park

it was delicious and just what I wanted and I felt great I was in a place that I fed my body exactly what I needed and I wasn’t craving anything else, and inner peace. And endorphins.

So yeah, that’s what’s in my mind. That’s what I’m going towards.

Today: 144.4kgs 1.4 lost

Meditation: 30 minutes.

 

 

Also, when the running kicks in- I cannot CANNOT WAIT to use the crap out of my Garmin. I’m so in love with that thing.

Refresh.

It’s almost New Year!

But let me point out that I don’t make New Year resolutions. I don’t like putting that sort of ‘stigma’, if you will, on it. For some it works, for me- I like outright making goals and sticking to them without the feeling that I can only make these sorts of goals, or changes, at new year. Plus I just don’t like seeing those around me make New Year resolutions and then fail at them. It happens so so often. So these goals are just refreshed. Anew.

 

I said in my last entry I wanted to do a marathon. This doesn’t mean I’m just going to go and do one. But I’m reading a book that a fellow CoolRunner sent me- that was completely not his style and totally my own- and one thing that caught my attention is to make sure I just keep on making goals. And not so much goals that are so far away I can’t touch them but even the smallest of goals.  The smallest goals you know you can get to, that you can taste and smell and feel confident enough to try for it.

But what’s more important is making the big goals at the end just that little bit out of your comfort zone. We underestimate ourselves when we strive for things, I think. And so a marathon is way- way- way outside my comfort zone. But a half? And I don’t even think I want to enter an official race for this, because I know a half could take me anything up to 5 or 6 hours to complete. But at least to set a date that I go out and do it. Even if I walk most of it.

So I’ve renovated my goals page, and and feeling okay about things. Bit scared to get on the scales but I got the balls so I’ll do it.

Took my Garmin for a spin yesterday and it was awesome. Still getting used to the Garmin applications though. For both Garmin Connect and an application a friend recommended to me called rubiTrack neither of them- so far as I can see- can map out running tracks or set really good goals. Garmin Connect doesn’t let me delete any goals I’ve set up either, since I’m just getting used to it and wanted to create a couple just to experiment with. And using the Garmin Training Centre is again entirely confusing. I’ve tried to look up help, videos, the whole shebang but Garmin SUCK on that aspect. They have FAQ’s but nothing to tell me what I really want to know, or what I can really use the Garmin Training Centre for. I’m so used to mapmyrun. If anyone can help out on that part I’d be much obliged!

I basically want something that will let me set straight forward goals and training outlines, that will let me map out my run perhaps prior to running, and keep my details all in a nice neatly wrapped little package. I’d prefer not to have to use three different applications for that. Given, with the Garmin, maybe the only facilities for that is to load up what I just did as opposed to letting me plan things for the future for my own reference, not necessarily to upload onto the Garmin.

So much to learn!

Surgery? Smurgery!

Run: 5kms 59.24 mins! Woohoo! I actually got my 5km under 60 minutes! I think I just achieved one of my Hot 100 goals. I’m going to have to look at that.

My last run I booked went so well but that’s because I was on the tready in the gym. I could push up my speed and it feels less awkward than when I try and pick up my pace on the pavement. With gravity, and the fact I don’t have a belt pushing my legs back as I go, it feels a lot harder.

Anyway, since that treadmill run I’ve been thinking that I can up my walking. When I have my walking breaks I’ve been dawdling. Not dawdling, but I have been at a very comfortable pace. So I upped it, since I’m feeling strong in my lungs and heart rate. My legs can keep up most of the time.

And because of that, I just got my 5ks back under an 60 minutes! I feel good. I feel great. Thankyou Universe!

The biggest one.

I came across Pippa‘s blog who is doing a wonderful challenge- Le Tour De France. She’s got a stationary bike and is doing all the KMs. That’s a huge challenge, one that will take many months to accomplish.

 

Then there’s marathons. People go out to do that, not knowing if they’ll be able to finish or not. But it’s been months and months of preparation. Their whole life can end up revolving around this one specific goal. Day in and day out, every choice you make.

 

This guy did the 6 foot marathon and set the record in 3 hours something. He’s a local guy, and 6 foot is one of the hardest marathons out there- at 45kms and nothing but steep hills as it winds through the Blue Mountains.

 

It makes me think about challenges we set ourselves that we’re not sure we can accomplish. I think they’re extremely important. It was like that goal I wanted to set, going from one side of Melbourne to the other. There’s a walking challenge that a few people I know have tried, which is the walk of Middle Earth. Walking from wherever the Lord of the Ring starts all the way to the end- Gondor? But yeah you basically track the kms you walk and go as far as Frodo went.

 

I have goals that I’m working my way to, and one that is changing my whole life. That’s my healthy life now. And it’s something that, even as confident and determined as I am there’s always the “will I do this?” element. I’ve never done anything this big in my whole life, I’m not sure I ever will again. It’s something that takes focus every day, ever hour, something that uproots every single habit and thought in my mind, and responses within my body.

 

But in order to do this, to maintain this, I want to have some other goal that makes it fun. To shift my focus from “I have to get this done so that I lose weight” to “I have to get this done because it would be awesome if I did it”. Don’t get me wrong, losing weight is awesome. But it can get tangled in a lot of emotions.

 

What’s your biggest challenge, that you’re just not sure if you’ll achieve but you’re putting everything into?

Recovery. Seriously | MM Time- PB

Ankle’s bung. Body is buggered. By the end of last night at the end of the birthday thing at Strike bowling Mike and I were soooo exhausted.Might need to ice it today.

I can’t get my results off the site. I don’t know if they’ve put up the 5.7kms yet.

I want to knoooooooow.

*Edit: Finally! I got my time! Time is 1:07:23. Yeeeeeha! Wow I’m so happy with that. That’s a 3 minute PB.

W.I.D.T.H

Why I’m Doing This Here. Why I’m doing this, on cards. No make-up, nothing. Just naked Scarlett, baring all.

Thanks to Jack Sh*t. Click on the pic to see the bigger image, if you can’t read the cards.

3 months Optifast- succeeded.

Jack Sh*t is awesome.

While in the bloggosphere I jump from blog to blog to blog. From one person to someone they referred to someone they have on their ‘recommended bloggers’ list etc etc.

This guy’s entry is heroic. I love it. Please check him out here. And you must look at his pie chart, it rings out so much truth as to why no weight was lost for all of us. Especially the “Belgian Waffle Incident” at 7% and also finding a “pound of fudge in the car’s glove compartment” at 8%. That happens to me ALL THE TIME.

I feel like I’m clear in the head. Last night I was intoxicated by the cravings, the wantings, but no! Mike stood his grounds and refused to get any snacks or nibblies or other foods – even though he wanted them too. That, my friends, is strength.

Also, looking back on my spreadsheet- Our experience with Optifast/Optislim has hit 3 months! We hit the 3rd month on the 17th of September. So congratulations to me for achieving 25kg loss in 3 months.

3 months: Total weight loss: 25.9kg.

Beginning weight: 163kg.

Current weight: 137.1kg. It may not seem like some, may seem a lot to others, but what does it mean to me? It means an incredible amount. It means that I can realistically look at the next three months – up until Christmas and NYE and really plan to go for another 25kg. That means I’ll be around 110kg. Holy wow!

Body Linguistics.

Why is it I feel this want to do something crazy. And I don’t mean just regular crazy but the sort of crazy that might drive me to physical cliffs and beyond. I see these people running from one side of Australia to the other. From one pole of the Earth to the other. Doing ultra marathons.

I wake up every morning and my body says RUN! Whether I tire out after five minutes or fifty minutes it’s what my body says. Whether my body can do it or not it wants to run.

I feel like doing something crazy or stupid like getting dressed one morning and then going out to run for the entire day. Just to run as far as I can, and walk, and run, and walk. Or setting myself a goal of going from one side of Melbourne to another. You see? Totally silly but something that just is so totally blown out of whack I wonder- why DON’T I try something like that?

Pre-race race eve.

Tomorrow morning is the SIS run at 8.30 for the 4.3kers. I’m a little bit excited.

Look out for the big woman, brown hair, red t-shirt, tights and of course sneakers. However I will have my headphones in so you’ll need to tap me on the shoulder if you think you see me. I hope I see someone I know, however how I would know them I can’t say. Look, this is me! Looking totally excited etc etc.

No exercise today, going to treat tomorrows run as a regular one, but with just a little bit more awareness and care. Having protein tonight, had some stuffed mushrooms for lunch today. We’ll see how we go. I’m also hoping to hit the 137kg that I have written down as a goal. I’m .5kg off. Lets see if it works out.

Thanks for the suggestions as to what might be going on with my body. I think it’s just the concoction of ingredients that are going on in my body right now. I’m changing everything, I’m changing this body into something completely new so yeah, things are going to happen. The combination of TOM, and this vegetarian eating, increased activity and exercise and sudden weight loss would all come together in some mish mash recipe. My body is letting a lot of stuff go, I don’t think the irregular TOM will continue, it was over as quickly as it was to begin with. Just got to let whatever happen happen, even if that means letting go of control of my goals. Sometimes I hold so tightly to them, fearful anything might go wrong in case I don’t get to my goal. Especially since the 10-10-10 event MM has a sort of yumminess about it to me. When I did it last, I was happy and it gives me fond memories and it is something I would like to keep being a sort of anniversary for hope, pride, new achievements and success.

That’s me for the 11th of September 2010. I’ll be back tomorrow!

Sussan Women’s Fun Run 10th December 2010

Mmmmm sultanas. Love them.

And before I forget- TB/Tony – yes I would love to know of other trails in Croydon.

Alex- SIS is Spring into Shape this Sunday in Melbourne. You can find it here, there are sets of three events over three months and I’m doing the 4.4km run.

I got my newest Runner’s World today and saw the Sussan Women’s fun run 10- 25th anniversary, women’s only fun run on December 5th. It’s a 5km and 10km run or walk, it’s at St Kilda, and it’s a nice distance from my 10-10-10 event.

Since being able to complete 5km- even though I am not yet able to just run  the whole way through without a two or three minute break here and there, I think I would like to try for 10km. By the 5th of December, if things go the way they’re going I’m expecting to be around maybe 40-50 kgs lost. However they issue T-shirts in the pack, which is awesome, and I would love to wear it, but nothing goes above a size 16. So what’s the point in that? Totally disappointed. But you never know, maybe by then I’ll be the right size. I would certainly like it to be on my ‘to do’ list, either the 5 or 10k. And I know the route, I used to run it three times a week when I lived in St Kilda, down Beaconsfield parade. Also being the beginning of summer should be perfect weather. I will put it on my goals list me thinks.

Going swimming tomorrow. Said no to pizza, diet coke, macadamia chocolate cookies and chicken tonight. I said yes to a couple of pieces of garlic bread though. But I figure that’s alright, I stuck out with everything else.

I’m on school holidays now. Now I can focus 100% on my health for the next two weeks and exercise when I like, and enjoy my daily routine. Am a little tired now of the last chapters in George Sheehan’s book, unfortunately. I know the chapters of suffering, meditation and growth are the ones that echo best with me but he writes in a stream of consciousness way. Like these thoughts are coming and he lets them roll out, meaning that several paragraphs tend to repeat themselves and surprisingly he writes like me, in describing things, but he hasn’t learned to restrain himself so after a while I feel like I’m floating in a fluff of ongoing thought BS. It’s not BS, I get what he’s saying, but it’s a book. I get those thoughts myself, I don’t need him writing them down and letting me read them. Still a lot of great points too.

Off too bed soon, swimming tomorrow, and Tony’s right, I do need to trust my training. I’ve never been in this territory before- fueled by all the great food I’m putting in my body and going from strength to strength with this running. I just gotta enjoy Sunday.